Tuesday, January 15, 2013


That feeling comes to me again..
I don't like that feeling
I always say that : live your own life
but, can I really do that?

Everyday I keep wondering is my decision correct?
My god ! I wouldn't want to suffer in this anymore
I'm afraid :(
Should I let go?
But I love him
love or need? I can't differentiate.................
I only know that I feel happy and comfortable with him
I thought this is the feeling of love. Doesn't it?
Or I don't understand what is love at all....

Just get counselling by my aunt.
She's still don't know about his existence in my life.
And yea, she gave me a lot of advises of not having boyfriend at this age.
I'm kinda agree with her reason but somehow I think that two person that can overcome life's difficulties together is awesome.
Don't you think so?
She's not thinking this way.
She said we should get together with a guy that have stable job etc
so that our life can be wonderful
we doesn't know the future at this age.
seems like she think that wealthy is needed for a blissful relationship and I don't think so.

One point of her that I agree is your partner may no longer feel excited with you after a long period staying together for no marriage.
Boys will lose passionate on you as you both stay together for so long.
She told me that shouldn't stay with boy before marriage
Even you're not doing anything with that boy but other people may not think so
This one I strongly agree.
and the sad thing is we can't control other's mind so do their mouth.

All things that she spoke out shake my mind.
I.....I don't know how to do..

And one more thing I want to mention.
I really can't feel that I am NEEDED for you.
It seems like you can have me or lose me.
I can't feel that you're fighting for me
I....kinda disappointed with that.
Is it I think too much ?
By the way, I feel thankful of your warming heart words to me when I feel unstable.

OMG I don't want to suffering with this anymore !
Jesus, save me :(


  1. why u always got so many things to think eh lol i have so many things to say about this lololol I DONT AGREE WITH UR AUNT AT ALL!!! no disrespect just different opinion lol but I dont wanna write u essay and later u say I kepo T.T dont think too much sampat po~things get better after you stop thinking about them <3 jiayou!

    1. my dad know about his existence already haha nothing to hide anymore. you know what? I will keep on thinking when I'm too free >< now is sem break. I have so many free time~ so bored.I don't mind you write me essay actually. Thank you so much la wey ! Why you so good ? ToT

    2. Nonid to hide one la daddys all get worry yi xia then ngam u yi xia then know ngam u pun no use then they accept it lol free jiu go out with him more la! give him more time show his love to u also ma hahaha thank me hami i didnt do anything also, just hoping that u can feel better thats all. it's really stupid cause later u'll realize your overthink and you're gonna be like hah i was dumb lol see i essay-ing again.scare u lazy read ma lolol me sampat pulak.

    3. you know what? he always make me feels like I'm not important. I don't like to ask him out with me because most of the time he can't ! I don't know why every time also so ngam.. met this and that barrier. so I let him say. he is such a wood. don't know how to say lah. sometimes disappointed with him and makes me feel wanna byebye but I couldn't LOL troublesome kid ><

  2. 喜不喜欢,适不适合,能不能在一起,是不同的事。加油!